lifestyle, personal Life Update: Health, Wedding, Job 14th November 2017

Hi. Hello. How are you? I’m still here!

I’ve gone a little MIA recently.. around 3 weeks, which in blogger time is an eternity. The last few have just flipped me upside down and life dropped a big stinking s**t on us just as we were getting ourselves together and getting excited for things to come. Always the way right?

So apologies for that, but I will give you a brief run down of who, what, where, when and why.

My Fiance has cancer; we all know this.. and if you didn’t, now you do. Actually it’s Classic Hodgkins Lymphoma Stage II/IV to be precise. Not sure why it’s called “classic” because literally NOTHING about his case has been classic by any stretch, but I digress.

This has been the biggest reason for my hiatus to be honest. We were expecting him to start a clinical trial a few weeks ago. He went up to Oxford on the Friday for scans and went back on the Monday to sign consent forms but over the weekend they had pulled the trial from new participants. Turns out some patients were getting Gullian Barre Syndrome as a side affect and it wasn’t reversing with conventional treatment. So to be safe they put the trial on hold and we don’t know when or if this will ever be made available again.

Karne had been on a 6 week washout (so no chemo) during a period where we knew his cancer was spreading, only to be told this was a waste of time. PISSED is an understatement. They want to put him back on conventional chemo and do a stem cell transplant for him in March at the latest. This fucked up a lot of our plans (I’ll get to that), caused many tears, tension, sadness and a feeling of hopelessness washed through our house. I think it was the worst we’ve been since we found out he had it, so understandably this had killed my motivation to do anything for a while.

We had planned, booked and were excited to get married in April 2018 but the recent kick in the teeth completely derailed it. Reason being.. with a stem cell transplant from a donor you are usually in hospital for around 3 months afterwards and are then on a full year’s ban on having contact with crowds/groups of people. You are essentially a new born baby, no immune system, and growing and regenerating one from scratch leaving you extremely vulnerable to sickness and infection. A common cold or fever could kill you.

With this in mind, Karne would either still be in hospital around this time if the procedure took place in Feb/March or be on his “no contact” ban which would make attending and participating in the wedding very difficult for him. Not to mention a HUGE risk.
So we had a few choices. We either cancelled, postponed until god knows when or bring it forward. We knew if we cancelled or postponed that we would lose all our deposits and the money we had already paid.. which wasn’t a big deal compared to the risks involved, but was a bitter pill to swallow.
We had a wobble and it didn’t look like it was going to happen for one reason or another, but we worked it out and got our rational heads on and decided to make the best of a bad situation and bring it forward.
The only dates the venue had free that could work for us was October 31st (which was 5 days after we found all this out) or December 22nd, so we went for December 22nd. Currently I am working on planning and finishing this bitch in less than 6 weeks where I previously had 4/5 months to prepate. So this has been pretty stressful, but I’m glad to say that all of our vendors (venue, cake, flowers, decorator, photographer, caters etc) have been amazing and more than happy to help us in our time of need.

This will be an amazing day for us and our way of giving Ccancer a giant middle finger. Because we’ll be going into all of this together, just as we started it. And the only thing that will get taken from us is me taking his last name. Choke on that you nasty, disgusting, relentless bastard of a disease!

The account I was working on before decided to make all of their admin/customer service in-house, so all 80 of us working it had to be distributed over other accounts within the company. With Christmas fast approaching, they needed all hands on deck with Photobox so I chose to transfer over to them.
I’ve been training with them full-time for the last 2-3 weeks, doing all my assessments and learning my way around their systems and getting to grips with all their products and the general enquiries that come with this account.

It’s been kinda stressful for me as training started at the same time everything fell apart with Karne.. so trying to maintain my focus and store the information I was getting was a little more difficult for me than usual. But I got there in the end and I passed my training (whoop whoop).
My Team Leaders, HR and Managers have been super supportive of everything that’s been going on, so my worrying was really not necessary. So now I’m focused on doing well, hitting my targets and performing my best on this new account.

*huge sigh*

So this is why I’ve been slack and not really dedicating a lot of time to my blog. But I/we’re in a much better place than we were before and now things are starting to tick along, hopefully I can get a little bit back to normal I can pick up where I left off.
I just wanted to take the time to thank everyone (you know who you are) for all their love and support at this time. It’s really heartwarming and you’ve all truly helped to turn things around for us.

Lots of love to you all.

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